Oct 23, 2020
The modern woman is often faced with more than ever before. She is expected to take care of all the “traditional” motherly demands that come with raising children and maintaining a home, but she is also often expected to have a career, be involved in the community, and overall be perfect.
Dr. Libby Weaver is helping to change the feeling of non-stop demands on our lives. Her book entitled “Rushing Woman’s Syndrome” directly addresses the feelings that many busy women are going through. She helps women to find a more balanced approach, showing that calming down and controlling the amounts of anxiety or pressure we place on ourselves will allow us to do the things we need to, and do them better.
One of the first thing to realize as a “Rushing Woman” is that you have a choice. You are in control of your actions and how you choose to respond to situations. With practice, you can even have a major influence on how you feel. Dr. Libby references Victor Frankl, a holocaust survivor and neurologist, who explains that everyone can choose their attitude in “any given set of circumstances.”
When someone asks a favor of you, or your toddler throws his plate against the wall, or your boss yells at you for someone else’s mistakes, you have a split second when you have a choice of how to respond. One way to respond in a way you won’t regret is to expand that split second. Pause and give yourself time to think about how you would like to react before you do or say anything. This will help you to feel more in control of the situation and therefore act like you do.
Have you ever read an article that describes the perfect morning routine? Or maybe your favorite magazine tells you to meditate 20 minutes a day, cook all your meals at home, exercise 47 times a week, and walk everywhere you go because driving your car is ruining the environment. Let’s be real, you don’t have time for everything, and neither does anyone.
However, when it comes to your wellbeing, there are some things that are worth “having time for.” The fact of the matter is that while you don’t have time for everything you do have time for any one thing. It’s often said that it’s not that you don’t have time for it, it’s that it’s not a priority in your life.
This can be hard to believe, but it’s rather simple to understand. Just think of the last time you had an emergency. Maybe you had to take your child to the ER to get stiches, or your car broke down, or your basement got flooded. That day, you made time for everything else, and took take of the emergency. When we are forced to prioritize something, we can realize what the crucial activities are.
So, pick a few things that are absolutely crucial to your health in your mind, and treat doing them like it’s an emergency. Getting eight hours of sleep is not impossible. But maybe working out for an hour, cleaning the house, working, playing with your kids, making dinner, going to a town meeting, AND sleeping eight hours is.
1) Start saying no. There are some things you can probably simply cut out. Maybe it’s the town meeting or an extra project at work or helping your friend move. It’s not easy to say no, but it’s an option, and a great way to feel in control.
2) Ask for help! Maybe you aren’t the person that likes to say no, so instead, ask for help yourself. Your spouse, a friend, a colleague, even your child can help free up some of your time.
3) Use your resources. You can be creative here, but if you know that getting sleep, or making time to cook at home really boosts your productivity elsewhere, don’t be afraid to spend some money to help get some things done. Hire a sitter for an hour just to take a nap, or pay someone to walk your dog or clean your house. If this is an option for you, it may be the best option.
Dr. Libby has so much more to add to getting out of the rushing woman rut. Tune in to this podcast and consider picking up her book (linked below). Remember, you are in control of your life. Make it a beautiful one.
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Thank you to Libby, I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the show.